The Twins birth story: August 19, 2017

It has been WAY to long since I have updated my little corner of the inter web. It was really important for me to document the twins birth story while it was still fresh in my mind. It is so hard to believe it has almost been a full month since these tiny humans have joined our family. 

I still can't believe we have THREE kids. three.
Deliveries are so unpredictable.

Backtracking a few months - pregnancy was fairly easy in comparison to what a high risk pregnancy could have been and I will forever be grateful for that. It didn't begin getting uncomfortable until the last month when my back had the worst time supporting my ever growing twin belly.

Towards the end of my pregnancy I unfortunately started showing signs of Preeclampsia - as I did when I was pregnant with Aubrey. My body felt completely fine but my blood pressure and lab work continued to show otherwise which led to very frequent doctor visits - 7 days in a row up until I delivered! 

During my frequent NST tests Jackson (commonly referred to as Baby A) was always very active and they never had trouble finding his heartbeat while Jameson was ALWAYS sleepy and inactive. They often had to use a vibration device to wake him up! The doctor and I agreed it was best for the twins and I to be admitted for monitoring on August 18th to make sure my blood pressure stayed under control. 

This was something I was reluctant to agree to because just 2 days prior my sweet Nana was admitted to the hospital as well and diagnosed with cancer. The last thing I wanted was for my family to then also have to worry about me being admitted during the current state of chaos we were already experiencing.  But knowing it was best for the babies I agreed. We started steroid injections for precaution in case the boys decided to make their appearance early! Oh my heck were those painful. Contractions were coming and going but they were bearable. Which truly says a lot as I have a very low tolerance for pain in general. 

After roughly 24 hours of being confined in a hospital bed along with the stress and worry about my blood pressure and whirlwind news about my Nana - I began to get a little stir crazy. More like anxiety was starting to set in big time. My mom was with me while Travis was at home with Aubrey since she very quickly developed a new separation anxiety since mama was away for so long. The nurse suggested I have my mom take me outside in a wheelchair to get some fresh air. The hospital I was at had a beautiful 2 mile path with waterfalls and large rocks that we sat near while she ate her cafeteria dinner and I ate some yogurt. 

Roughly ten minutes in to our snack date the worst & most severe migraine set in - unlike anything I have ever experienced. My vision got slightly blurry and tiny black dots filled my peripheral view. I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach because that was the very LAST symptom of preeclampsia that the doctors were looking for that I had not experienced yet. 

I knew my sweet boys were going to come way too early.

In true Mom fashion she began panicking and rushed me back up to my room.

The doctor wanted to give us a little while to see if dimmed lights and fluids would help get rid of the symptoms. Sadly they continued to get worse and I was suddenly overwhelmed with fear because it all began happening quicker than I could process. 

I was only 33 weeks and 2 days pregnant. This was way to early for them to enter this world.

At 10:45pm the doctor decided she was not comfortable in waiting any longer as all it was doing was increasing my risk for seizing. 

She called for an emergency cesarean.

Not what I had hoped my twin birth would be.

One after another doctors and nurses started flooding my room with papers to sign, risks to discuss, anesthesia consents and so forth. 

My mom called Travis immediately and our sweet family friend Diana rushed over to be with Aubrey.

It felt like hours and he had still not walked through the hospital doors. The doctors didn't feel comfortable waiting any longer and gave my Mom the surgical attire to wear to be by my side.

Was this really happening? Was my husband going to miss the birth of our boys?

At that point I honestly did not care who was by my side. I was so terrified of everything that was happening so quickly. I will never forget the look of fear in my Mom's eyes - I really don't think she was prepared to be front and center for this moment! 

She could see the fear across my face as tears started to pour down my cheeks. Im not quite sure if it was the lack of sleep, situational stress, fear for their safety or the major abdominal surgery that was about to come my way but I completely lost my marbles. I was terrified.

As the doctor and nurses all began their important chatter and discussion about medical releases etc my Mom tried calming me down by tuning them out and telling me the story of the day I was born. 
I will never forget that moment. 

Finally at a little after 11pm they wheeled me into the operating room. It was bright, cold and sterile. So many people were in the room. Each twin had their own team to make sure their entrance was safe and that they would each have proper care.

Once my spinal tap was administered a nurse came in and cheerfully said "Your husband is here he made it just in time!"

The next several minutes were an absolute blur. I felt a little pressure of them tinkering away on my lower abdomen but I had assumed they would have given me a heads up that they were getting started. NOPE! Travis entered the OR gowned from head to toe, barely sat down on the stool next to my head when I felt a huge relief of pressure removed from my belly just a few seconds later. This was immediately followed by a loud but tiny cry. 

Jackson was here. 
Born at 11:20pm 4lbs 13oz 17.3 inches

It sounded just like a mighty little puppy! Relief washed over me and all of the fear and anxiety I was recently experiencing no longer clouded this amazing birth experience. 

Just two short minutes later I felt another rush of relief and a soft but mighty cry and just like that - 
Jameson was here.
Born at 11:22pm 4lbs 3oz 17.1 inches

Up until that moment we were naming the boys Jackson and Cameron. Now Im not quite sure if it was the drugs, exhaustion, rush of hormones or pure joy but I looked at Travis and said "I really want him to be named Jameson". He agreed. And that was that! 

Our two boys were here.

The fact that skin to skin contact was not an option was heartbreaking for me as that was a very special moment I experienced with Aubrey and was very much looking forward to with the twins. But for their safety Travis left my side and rushed over to the boys. He was able to cut their umbilical cords and follow them directly to the NICU.

The next 30 or so minutes went by very slow. My support system was gone and I was laying on an operation table not exactly knowing what was happening. 

Once they had finally finished I was wheeled into recovery and Travis held his phone to show me all of the pictures of the boys. Pictures. It was an awful feeling not being able to see them with my own eyes. 

I had lost a significant amount of blood during the procedure and with my blood pressure still high they wanted to start medication to prevent seizures from happening. I instantly began to shake uncontrollably which did not allow me to get up and walk for the first 24 hours.

If they thought I was going 24 hours without meeting my newborn twins they were CRAZY.

Shortly after midnight they wheeled me into the NICU and I was able to see them for the first time.

It was so surreal seeing them in the incubators hooked up to monitors and breathing tubes.

 I couldn't help but hate my body for not cooperating and making them come onto this planet earlier than they should have. It was a guilt that was unrealistic but uncontrollable. 

I was assured that both boys were actually doing quite well for being born so early. Only Jackson needed temporary help breathing. Both needed an IV and feeding tubes.

The next few days were a blur of medication, painful walking, family and friends visiting. I was not prepared for the outpour of love & support that my sweet friends and family showered us with. It was extremely humbling to feel how many people truly supported us during this time. 
The entire experience of the twins being in the NICU is hard to put into words.  Realistically I knew this was the safest place they could be but it did not stop the overwhelming feelings of worry and hope. Every time I signed out of the NICU visiting list my heart broke a little and by the time I would reach my car tears would be streaming down my face. Leaving your babies is hard even when they are being taken care of by awe inspiring people 24 hours a day. 
Thankfully the boys were only in the NICU for 14 days! 14 days of late night drives to snuggle those sweet boys and they traveled home on a cloudy Sunday afternoon.  

Just like that our family was complete. 
Welcome to the world Jameson Kent and Jackson Alex - our gentle little warriors.

Part 2: Meeting Aubrey to follow